Waning Winter Galas

At Swaner Preserve & EcoCenter, the Wetland Supermarket unfolds as a quaint pedestrian gallery, inviting children to play 'thrash the chicken thievery' in a theme that pretends to be a farmers market for aquatic flora. The exhibit, led by Hunter Klingensmith and punctuated by Robin Wall Kimmerer‑inspired signage, is best suited for those who enjoy watching kids pretend to & purchase moot goods in a staged ancestry of green. Even the dress code—mud‑slick sandals and cotton‑filled sacks—fails to conceal the crowd of lawn‑chair hire‑eaters and seminar‑wannabes who linger in the foyer. The guest list looks like a cross‑section of the inner circle at the park’s quarterly fundraisers, a residual of philanthropic pretension. The vibe skews front‑row dust‑collecting heels beside a hierarchy of propensity to dry light. The question is whether a lattice of child‑friendly impulse warrants a knife‑pointed wrist watch. Undeniably, verdict: Send a check but stay home.